Digesting reality

I must start where I am, as I am and how I am.

There is no other way, nowhere else to go,

nowhere else to find, no one else to be.

I must start where I am, as I am, how I am.

When you really see the truth of the things that are in your reality.

How do you not go crazy, thinking, "this is what I chose for me?"

The epiphany living through me.

How do you forgive yourself?

How do you accept the fact that "It's all me," the dictator of my reality.

I am here because my decisions brought me, here.

No other invisible forces to curse, to blame, nobody else that can set me free,

no one else can save me.

It's all me.

It's strange to know you are where power lives, you are where fire breathes.

So used to being in the act of victim mentality.

With my hands up in the air, free, free from self-responsibility.

Crying, "oh god save me."

I guess god listened and saved me

Saved me from my own illusions, delusions, hallucinations of false realties

Showed me my own fallacies

the beliefs causing tragedies

Shattered the tinted glass

dropped the veil

awakened me to my own doings, my "faults"

allowed me to question my thoughts

I guess god listened and saved me

instead of blame, the finger pointed right back at me

because I am where power lies

I can make all the wrongs right

I can stay and fight

I can leave the sight

I can choose who, what or where I wanna be

I always chose

consciously or unconsciously

and in all conditions, I had something that was serving me

meeting a need or making me feel safe

familiarity over what is unknown

I always chose

consciously or unconsciously

"Awakening to the self" is awareness of my feelings,

listening to the loud whispering chatter, the undercover motives

It's to know that I am always choosing,

consciously or unconsciously

It's seeing that my life is a result of my choices,

made consciously or unconsciously.